So this brings us to the end of another year, as the clocks tick and the calendar in the sky turns over into 2006 the question on everyone’s mind is: What’s it going to be like next year?
To be perfectly honest, no one can know what 2006 will hold, no 1 person knows, and personally that’s the way I prefer it. I thought I would never say this, but there’s something exciting about looking down an unlit tunnel knowing that at some point there are good things that are going to happen during the 365 day walk to the end.
“The unknown frightens us, we all like to feel in control even though most of the time our power over most things is just an illusion, but I find the more we know about something the more we can convince ourselves we are in control of it”
The unknown is frightening, because it is the unknown, anything can happen, but at the same time it’s exciting, precisely for the reason that anything can happen, in the same way good things happened in 2005, good things will also happen in 2006, but at this moment in time, nobody knows what or when they will be.
There are many things that I regret from 2005, but over the last months I’ve realised one thing: It’s happened, it can’t be changed, so why worry, sure, be unhappy, but then move on, nothing ever happens to the person that is stuck in the past.
Most of the things that happened in 2005 are responsible for where and who I am today, they have transitioned from regret to lessons learned, confined to the area in my mind labelled: Things NOT to do in the future. But that’s ok, I’ve learned and moved on.
Despite everything that has happened the ups and the downs 2005 wasn’t a bad year, even though most of it was filled with worry, decision making wasn’t all that bad, and it wasn’t as if that much was riding on it, just the future of the rest of my life, no biggy. But it was fun, the random things that happened, the tourist attraction crawl towards the end and the events that I was part of all added up to the 2 best years so far, and I don’t think they’ll be easy to improve upon.
For the past few weeks the news channels have been playing clips of stories and interviews from the past year, looking back and reviewing things now that the initial excitement has died down. I can’t help wondering when these types of things are on what one about my year would be like. I can just imagine a clip of the news reader reading one of the many headline stories
“We are getting reports of increased stress levels in the Torbay area of the southwest, independent sources have confirmed that the situation is reaching a near critical level and are warning members of the public to stay in their homes until the situation has subsided”
Then it would fade into a clip of an interview with some random innocent bystander with a sparkly key to a ‘tracker and a piece of antique straw in his mouth.
“Well, I was just standing here, minding me own, and suddenly I saw him walking past all normal like, so I thought nothing of it, just carried on milking me cows and shaving me sheep, and suddenly I heard this great big explosion over the crest of that hill o’ver there, at first I thought it was just the tracker that little Jimmy was on backfiring, but then I thought to meself, hang on a second Mr brain, that don’t sound like no tracker to me, it sounds like one of those new jetty aircraft things that they are playing with these days, so I put down me sheep and looked around”
This is the part when the interviewer, not caring one bit about what this obviously unintelligent person was saying – says in a very sarcastic and uninterested tone of voice trying to fake enthusiasm that he didn’t feel “Go on, what happened next” leading the farmer to say:
“Well that’s when it goes all cloudy you see, I don’t remember much but from what that lovely ambulance woman said he just exploded with stress. The first thing I thought was how much it sounded like those jetty things, and then I remembered that I’d left me kettle on”.
Obviously the story would then be cross checked with other sources that were as equally credible, and then a conclusion would be made from there.
But I often do wonder what such a program would really be like, probably quite funny now that I can see the mistakes that I’ve made.
Reading through past posts is always interesting, perhaps because I can see exactly where I went wrong and still remember what I was thinking when I made them. The posts about the impending university move and also the saga that went with it brought all of the memories back, remembering all of the doubts and also thinking about how stupid some of the assumptions were, I guess it proves that making assumptions about the unknown can and almost always does bring with it a certain amount of avoidable apprehension, my theory was simple, expect the worst.
More recently the posts have had a happier aura about them, could this mean that I’m actually enjoying myself?
So my final word of 2005: Learn from the mistakes you made, if you don’t, then everything that happened has been wasted.
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Looking Back